School.

If I had the chance to name it, I would’ve called it Hell.

Perhaps I was just a teenager, and it was the only thing on my mind.

“Nice perfect score!” someone behind me exclaimed.

I turned around, thinking there was a misunderstanding, but he was talking to Rei Hirano, not me. Rei’s head bobbed up and down as he scanned his test. As expected, he got a 50/50. He was a particularly smart student that I knew for a bit.

“Alright,” Aoki-sensei called out. “If you're not satisfied with your test score, you should’ve studied harder. We'll be moving on to today’s lecture and a new unit.” 

Everyone went back to their seats as Aoki-sensei continued her lecture. I took a look at my hand. The pain was gone, there was no writing on it. It held a smooth purple stone that I found last night. It suddenly occurred to me that I fell asleep.

“Was this class that boring?” I murmured.

I stared at the purple stone. Was this rock the thing that caused that dream? I didn’t even understand what that dream was. I rubbed my forehead, thinking I was just tired from the late night I pulled yesterday.

As my focus cleared, I took a look at Aoki-sensei’s lecture. Derivative problems littered the board, making it quite an eyesore. 

Instead, I took out one of my physical chemistry textbooks for some other class. 

I glanced at Rei. His head was already buried in a textbook. Figures. I was halfway finished with a chapter before the bell rang.

 “Class is dismissed. Please turn in your homework from yesterday to the tray on your way out.” Aoki-sensei said. 

Ah crap. I forgot it.

I quickly left the room, hoping Aoki-sensei didn’t see that I turned in nothing. After finishing my many remaining classes, the end of school bell rang, signifying school was over. As I was leaving, I bumped into one of my teachers, Kim-sensei. 

“Oh, hi! Sorry I didn’t see you. Are you coming to the volunteer club today?” he asked. As the advisor of the club, he cared about the attendance of the members.

“Yes, I was heading there right now.” 

“Great! Today's an important day because we will be assigning which pods you will be in and cover the information behind tomorrow’s volunteer event!”

Tomorrow... what? I guess I wasn’t paying attention to my email. Tomorrow will be Saturday... Well, it is not like I have much to do tomorrow.

“Ah, okay.”

“Well, I have to grade the tests from last period so I’ve got to go now. See you tomorrow!”

“Yeah, see you! Bye!”

I waved to him as he hurried off. After navigating a bit, I entered the room. There were around 18 people, but of them all, there were two faces I recognized. My sister, Kazane Hinode, who was a year younger than me, and to my surprise, Rei. I hurriedly got into a random seat, where no one else sat by.

“This is the second meet of the year! For those who missed the last meet, I am Saitou.” Saito-sensei walked around the board, looking at everyone. “In the previous meeting, we learned about what events we would do. Today, we will be assigning pods for the year. They’re chosen at random with biases towards the survey last week” She switched the screen to a chart. 

I squinted, scanning my eyes to find the pod that I was listed under. Under Pod D, I could see the names Ayato Hinode, Kazane Hinode, Ayaka Hirano, and Rei Hirano listed. Rei was in my pod. With his sister I suppose? I didn’t know much about him, so for all I know, he could have brothers too.

“Alright, please go to the table where your pod is supposed to meet up and get to know each other’s names.”

My sister ran up to me, her light brown eyes sparkling with excitement.

“Hey! My friend Ayaka was also put into my pod. She got her brother in the pod too, so it should be pretty easy for everyone to get to know each other!”

I scratched my head, wondering why I never knew about Ayaka. Did she just, never talk about her?

“So basically Ayaka and you put each other as well on the preferences and so you guys were fated to be put in the same pod?”

“Yup,” Kazane said. “Anyway, I’m going to talk to Ayaka now. See ya!”

I watched my sister run towards a girl. So this is Ayaka, huh? Rei’s little sister. 

“Ayato,” a voice said from behind. 

I turned around. Rei stopped as he got near me, putting a hand on his hip.

“Hi,” I replied. Something about talking to him made my leg shake. It wasn’t like this was the first time talking to him though. My hand shook, and an uncomfortable feeling settled in my stomach. I took a breath, which seemed to untie the knots surprisingly well.

“How is everything going?” Rei asked.

“Okay, I guess”

“I see.”

Rei glanced back towards Ayaka and Kazane who were chatting. 

“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I said, driving my foot into the ground to stop my knee from shaking. 

“She doesn’t really like to draw attention to herself.” Rei paused, staring at his sister. He glanced at the clock. “Anyways, we should probably get to the group.”

Me and Rei headed over to their table, just in time to hear Ayaka and Kazane chatting.

“Yeah, I planted trees for Earth Day last year as well, so I should know how to plant trees,” Kazane said.

“I see...” Ayaka said, giving her a nod. In her nod, she noticed us. Her dark black hair glistened as she slowly turned her head towards us. Her mouth opened, almost as if she wanted to say something, but just as fast, she closed it, taking a breath.

“This is Ayato,” Rei said, looking at me. “He was from the chemistry club a while back.”

“The chemistry club?” Ayaka asked, tilting her head. There was a sparkle in her blue eyes while she was thinking. “Oh, I almost forgot. It’s been a while since then.” She cleared her throat. “Were you that guy that was always at the back tables?”

I blinked. What a funny way to be remembered. Then again, there were only 10 people or so in our chemistry club back in junior high.

“Well, I guess you could describe it like that.”

Ayaka nodded, her eyes wandering to her nails, leaving the conversation blank.

Kazane coughed, as if to clear the air. “Rei huh?” she repeated, looking at him. “We never met, but I did hear a lot about you from my brother.”

“Is that so?” Rei asked. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Kazane.”

“Nice to meet you too,” Kazane replied, nodding.

As the heavy silence filled our conversation, Kazane looked around. “Anyway, we were just talking about the event tomorrow. I asked Ayaka if she had experience planting trees. And she did because of last year, that Earth day event.” Kazane remarked.

“You mean the thing they had you do at the end of junior high?” I asked, my eyes observing the ground. Surprisingly, there were quite a bit of cracks in the marble-like material. Maybe it was by design.

“Yeah, that event. Tomorrow’s event is something like that, probably.”

“I don’t remember that event being particularly difficult,” Rei said. He tapped his fingers on the desk. “Though I wouldn’t say it’s the most fun either.”

I suppose we weren’t good at driving conversations, because there was a long moment of silence again. As I opened my mouth to say something, Saitou-sensei cut me off.

“Well, it seems that it’s getting late,” Saitou-sensei interrupted. She paused, before glancing at the clock. “Tomorrow’s meeting at the park is at 16:00. Take care, and I hope to see you there!” The teacher turned off the projector.

The four of us stared at the ground, as if wondering what to say.

“Well, it seems that our first meeting for the year has been adjourned,” Rei said, looking up.

“Yeah,” Kazane said. She gripped the edge of her backpack. “May we meet tomorrow.”

I nodded. We waved to Rei and Ayaka. After saying our goodbyes, I left the room, with Kazane trailing me.

As we walked home, Kazane stretched.

“Ah, it’s such a nice day, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.”

As I was walking, there was a warm feeling in my pocket.

“What’s this…”

Reaching into my pocket, I felt the purple stone. When I took it out, I saw the etchings.

GRS. Fourth Left Knight.

Ah.

There was a tinge of familiarity when I saw the word GRS. What it was, I didn’t remember.

Sounded like some gang name or slogan.

Putting the rock back into my pocket, a smile tugged on the corner of my lips.

For the first time in weeks, I was clear of things to do. My homework, the volunteer club, everything. I could go home and relax. All my exams were finished, and I could sleep in.

All that was left was just a simple volunteer event tomorrow.

“Life sure is great, huh.”

With that, I stretched my hand towards the sky.

“How do you solve this?” Kazane was fiddling around with a 3x3 Rubik’s cube. 

“Here,” I said, holding my hand towards the cube. “I can solve it for you.” She threw me the cube.

“Have you tried a 4x4?” Ayaka asked.

I continued to apply algorithms to it.. “I can solve up to 5x5.”

Kazane decided to bring up something, while watching me solve the cube. “I heard the new mall has opened. It’s within a mile.”

I could guess what she was asking for next, and slumped in my chair, my eyes never leaving the cube. “You wanna go to the mall?” I asked.

Kazane nodded. “Yeah, I want to see what stores are in it.”

Rei hardly looked up. “I am a bit busy, so I am unable to go.”

Ayaka had an uncomfortable expression, and looked like she was thinking. “Ehm... It’s a Sunday right?”

“Yup,” Kazane told her.

Ayaka murmured something under her breath. “Sure,” she declared.

“Alright then!”

Being unable to say no to the very hyped Kazane, I had to go. 

Kazane ran downstairs to tell our parents. We quickly got dressed, and walked to the mall. 

“Wow, this the biggest mall around here,” Kazane said, looking around. We had just passed through the entrance. Ayaka walked up to us. 

“So... What store do you want to check out?”  she asked.

Kazane looked towards one of the stores across. “Let’s start off with the electronic store!” she said excitedly.

Of course she would pick that store. Not that I was complaining.

“Alright, are you fine with it?”  I asked Ayaka.

She nodded. And so, we headed towards the electronic store.

“Wow, check this out!” Kazane was looking inside one of the displays. “It looks cool, what is it used for?”

I peered into the glass. “That’s a router. It emits wifi.”

“The one at our house looks so lame...”  Kazane said.

“I don’t really care about how it looks, just how it performs. Plus, upgrading your router is the last thing you should think about upgrading.” 

Speaking of which, where did Ayaka go? We walked in ahead of her and haven’t seen her since we entered the store. 

Kazane, who seemed to realize Ayaka was missing, spoke up first. “Where did Ayaka go?” she asked, looking around. 

We retraced our steps back, and found Ayaka in the appliances section. Of all the electronics you could look at, she chose appliances. Wow, just wow. 

“There you are!” Kazane said, running up to her. “We were wondering where you went.” 

Ayaka looked up from the display she was looking at. “Oh it’s just you guys. Sorry, I got distracted by these blenders.” 

“Do you cook?” Kazane asked.

“I can, but my mom usually does all the cooking.”

Kazane looked excited, probably because she finally found a cooking partner to help her. 

“Anyway, you should probably avoid wandering off without telling us.” I decided to interject so that the conversation did not escalate in that direction.

“Erm, sorry about that, but I usually shop alone so I forgot that I was shopping with people.”

“You usually shop alone?” Kazane asked, sounding somewhat accusing. 

Ayaka averted her eyes. “Usually.”

“That’s not right! Shopping is much funner when you shop with people!“ Kazane said.

“Hmmm, I think shopping alone is funner than shopping with people,” I interjected. “It also is the most efficient.”

“You think that way because you’re you!” Kazane remarked. “And you’re, you’re kinda corrupt.”

“Oi, what is that supposed to mean just now? That last part was uncalled for.” 

Ayaka chuckled at the sight of us bickering like this. “Whether I am ‘corrupt’ or not, I agree with Ayato on this matter.”

Kazane seemed surprised.

“You think like a corrupted human, according to my sister,” I said.

“That’s... that’s...” Kazane seemed stumped.

“Anyway,” Ayaka said. “Rei’s birthday is in four days. I should probably shop for a present.”

Rei’s birthday... is in four days?

“Well, I should get him a present too, he carried our chemistry team,” I said.  

Ayaka nodded. Since she was also on our chemistry team, she would know what I was talking about. 

“Well, I might as well do my shopping trip for the week,” Kazane said, seeming to have broken out of her ‘daze’.

Ayaka looked at the two of us. “Alright, I’m going to check out the bookstore since he likes to read a lot of books.”

Figures. And so, we decided to visit the bookstore. 

“What book series is that?” I asked. Ayaka was looking at a book she picked off the shelf. It was a pretty thick book, and the cover was blueish. 

“It’s a book series my brother used to read. He liked the series a lot.”

I looked at the shelf where she picked the book from. “Does your brother read manga?” 

Ayaka flipped the book cover over and slid it back into the shelf. “Now that you mentioned it, he mostly just reads manga these days.”

He actually reads manga? That’s new. 

“What kind of manga does he read?”

“A pretty large variety of them. He can read almost any manga as long as it’s good”

“He is a manga enthusiast?”

“Well... yes.”

So, maybe I’ll just get him some manga instead of textbooks and equipment like what I was originally thinking. 

“Well, I’m gonna visit the manga section then.” I said.

I began walking to the manga section, until I realized someone wasn’t here with us. 

It was the person who told us shopping together was fun.

“Where’s Kazane?” I asked abruptly. 

Ayaka looked around. “Oh... I should’ve noticed she was gone,” 

Sighing, I took out my phone. “Kazane was just saying to shop together a while ago...” Fortunately, I knew Kazane’s phone number so I can just call her, not like with Ayaka. After I punched in her number, I waited for an answer.

“Hello, Ayato?”

“Where did you run off to?”

“Oh... I found this shop along the way, and it was really interesting! I didn’t want to bother you guys so I just went by myself.”

“Weren’t you the one that said shopping together was fun? Why did you just ditch us?”

“Somehow, I hear irritation in your voice. Why are you so irritated? Aren’t you the one who likes shopping with fewer people? Or is it because I left y-”

I hung up, stopping her from finishing, and sent a voicemail to meet outside the mall at 12:00, or an hour from now. I glanced back at Ayaka, who was just inspecting the shelf. “Kazane went to do her own bit of shopping, so she left us.” I think she could hear the irritation in my voice.

“Did something happen?” she asked.

“No, it’s nothing.” I then sighed. “Anyways, my sister decided to solo.”

“Oops, maybe I gave her some bad influence.”

“I guess we just go by ourselves now.”

While we were checking...

“That title seems familiar... I think he read the manga around 2 months ago.” Ayaka said. 

“Well, this volume just got released a few weeks ago. Maybe I should get it for his birthday?”

Ayaka skimmed the book. “I think he might like it. At worst he’s already read it but doesn’t own a hardcopy because I haven’t seen him buy another volume since.”

“Alright,” I said. “I’ll get it for his birthday.”

It was around 1200 yen, but that’s not too much.

We went to the checkout, and bought the book. 

“I’m probably going to buy something other than a book, since Rei would probably like to receive distinct items,” Ayaka said, watching me put the book in a gift bag. This book store allowed you to pay a bit extra for wrapping for gifts, so I just paid an extra 100 yen. 

“Oh, I see.” I said. Well, Ayaka had a much better sense of what Rei likes than I do, so shopping with an unlimited scope would be easier for her. “Well, then, do you have an idea of what your present will be?”

“No, not really. I’m just going to roam around the mall and see what other stores it has.”

We left the bookstore and walked inside the mall.

“What should I get...” Ayaka said, aimed at no one in particular, her hair swaying as she took her steps. 

We headed into the supercenter(Target) inside the mall. 

“What section are you going to visit?” I asked.

Ayaka was scanning the signs on the ceilings. “Probably the office section.”

What was your impression of Rei? Then again, I was thinking the same thing.

“Alright, let's head there then,” I said.

“What are these?” Ayaka asked, while looking at the lava lamps on one of the shelves. We were originally walking across the aisle, but she saw some lava lamps and went into the aisle. 

“That’s a lava lamp. They're kinda like a lightbulb, but work completely differently.” I explained.

Ayaka was focusing on one that was blue and purple, inside a cylindrical case. I think she was genuinely interested in it. “Maybe I should buy a lava lamp for Rei...”

“That’ll be a cool present. Who doesn’t like lava lamps? Lava lamps are cool.” I said.

Ayaka nodded in agreement. I guess she already thought they were cool after just meeting them. That’s just how awesome lava lamps are. 

She was still staring intently at the blue and purple lamp. 

“Do you like that lamp?” I asked.

Her gaze snapped from the lamp to me. “W-well, I like it, but I don’t think the colors will suit Rei very well.”

“Why don’t you buy one for yourself and then a different one for Rei?”

“Well, it does cost 3000 yen and I only have the money to buy one, which I want to spend on my brother’s gift.”

“I mean, if you want it that badly, I could always just give you some money.”

“O-oh...” Ayaka seemed flustered, seeming to be pondering on my offer. “Thanks.”

She picked up a lamp box below the shelf and put it in her shopping basket. “I’m going to find one for Rei now.” she said.

We settled on an orange/red one that was in a cuboid shape. 

“That will be 7000 yen,” the checkout lady said. Lava lamp one was 3000, and Rei’s lamp was 4000.

I handed Ayaka 2900 yen. Since we came to a mall, I brought extra money, around 5000 yen since, well, it’s a mall. 

“Thanks,” Ayaka said to me, after taking the money. She handed the cashier our money. She had 4100 yen on her, so we were able to afford it.

We exited the store, with the lamps and the book in our shopping bags.

“Where’s Kazane?” Ayaka asked.

I pulled out my phone and called my sister.

“Hello, Ayato?”

“Me and Ayaka are done. Where are you?”

“Oh, I’m almost done shopping. Wait for me at where we entered the mall.” She hung up.

“Kazane told us to wait for her at the entrance,” I said to Ayaka.

“Oh... Okay,” she said. 

We left and started our way towards the exit. Ayaka stopped walking suddenly. 

“What is it?” I asked her, following her gaze. She was just staring off into space.

“Em, I was just wondering if you would be interested in joining the chemistry club again.”

“Joining… them again?”

"Yeah. Like being part of the team. Competing together with them again, celebrating victories and defeats with us."

"I see..."

My mouth quivered.

The moment she had said that, a wave of coldness washed through me.

What the feeling was it was hard to say.

No.

The truth was, I was 100% sure what the feeling was.

Why did it scare me so much?

Joining back, seeing everyone’s faces.

I already thought that my life was pretty stable. Why did I need to do such a thing?

"I..."

But.

There was something that I did feel when I thought about the club.

The faces that I abandoned that I would see again, the faces of the people that I threw away that I thought would forget me.

I didn’t want them to forget. And I did want to join them as they celebrated the future.

But even so.

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

Ayaka asked, turning back. She didn't seem to give up.

My teeth clenching, my head dropping to the ground.

"Was today fun?"

Ayaka questioned, tilting her head.

"A bit... Well, yeah."

“Then it's perfect. The chemistry club does plenty of events like these. You could be with the gang, with me and Rei, with a lot of other friends.”

“ーーーー”

“I’m sure some of them will recognize you, and I’m sure some of them might not remember you.”

“ーーーー”

“And I’m sure that something happened in the past that perhaps may have done something.”

“ーーーー”

“Whatever that happened in the past, if you need to, you’ve always got the group. It might be hard that you left them so long, but I’m sure everyone will be able to let go whatever feelings they used to have, and start a new life.”

“Start a new life.”

“Yeah. Like making friends, working with everyone, and finally getting something done.”

Ayaka smiled.

“There’s a bright future ahead. Take my hand.”

The hand that she reached out, it stood above the ground that seemingly had condensed into black. There wasn’t anything that I could see behind her fingers, nothing on the ground, nothing about the ground.

I guess.

It wouldn’t be too bad.

Reaching out my hand.

Take something further. Take something to a land where values mean something, take something to a land where the values that you treasure could amount to something more than sand. Maybe all this something that I've been holding could have purpose.

Let me try.

And with that, I clasped her hand.

At that moment, I lost my vision.

~~~~~

“Where…”

I could feel my eyelids open, and I could see the dark silhouette of my hands. And yet beyond, there was nothing but dark walls.

“Where am I?”

More frantically, my head shot around.

Darkness.

There was nothing to be seen.

“What in the world…”

Just when I thought that returning to the chemistry club would get me somewhere.

“Take me back!!”

My voice echoed, ringing the edges of the chasm.

Silence.

Gritting my teeth, I sucked my breath. Opening my mouth, I prepared to shout.

"TAKE MEー"

A loud boom. It interrupted my yell, sounding like thunder as it rolled through the black void. Then, an echoing voice.

"I suppose that's why they always say reality is often disappointing."

The echo rolled like the boom that came earlier. In response, I clenched my jaw, looking around for the speaker. I yelled back.

"Reality... Who the hell are you?"

"Who am I?"

A cackling voice.

"You'll find out. But say, since you seem so interested in reality and returning? Why don't we do that? I'll gladly take you back."

"...Alright. Then take me back."

Thank goodness I was going to get out, and the person agreed.

I didn't know who or what this was, but honestly, I couldn't care the slightest.

The only thing that mattered was thatー

Click.

~~~~~

Suddenly, my vision was clear.

A boy laid on the floor in front of a cloaked figure.

Blood from underneath him flowed out, into the cracks of the bricks, through and underneath a railing.

With his final strength, he reached out, towards an unmoving figure.

“Very well. I’ll save you.”

The cloaked figure lifted his hand, and with a purple glint, the shard was brought upon the boy.

Crack.

Blood spewed from his head, out where the shard had been deeply etched. His eyes rolled up, the boy fell to the ground, collapsing in an unmoving heap.

“Hmph. Save you. I suppose I did.”

~~~~~

The vision cleared.

My hands shot towards my chest, my eyes, and my skull, patting them.

They were in one piece, no blood, no fissures.

Then, my hands landed in my face, to feel my face muscles twisting in anguish.

“Why am I… seeing myself die?”

That boy in the vision had the exact same face as me.

It wasn’t possible that… we were the same person?

Feeling my body, there was a tinge of pain of where the boy had been killed.

"What... that was..."

My mouth forming into shapes, yet unsensical murmering came out.

Was that really reality?

No. This was some test. Some dream. Someー

Click.

~~~~~

The boy took deep breaths, laying against a tree. His face was covered with blood, and his adobement was stinged with red.

Then, a black wave that flew at unnatural speeds.

Slash.

Without the boy even being able to react, the top of his body suddenly fell. Cleanly bisected from the chest, the shoulders of the boy, along with his head and arms, landed on the ground, rolling a few feet before stopping.

Blood splattered the grass, as well as gray matter from organs. Red tissue, the heart, and pink tissue, the lungs, collected in piles all across the ground.

And across, stood the same cloaked figure. His arm was stretched out, having launched the wave.

“Strange. What in the world was a GRS doing here?”

Muttering under his breath, he scratched his head.

Click

~~~~~

The boy, who only had his body, stood below the cloaked figure.

As he took his next breath, a wolf-like monster lunged down.

Its teeth sank into the boy’s eye. Blood and eye tissue spewing from the boy’s head, the wolf continued snapping its jaws until the boy’s face was a bloody mess.

The cloaked figure sighed.

“What am I going to do with this…”

~~~~~

My vision cleared.

My hands shot towards my chest, my eyes, and my skull, patting them.

They were in one piece, no blood, no fissures.

Then, my hands landed in my face, to feel my face muscles twisting in anguish.

"Why am I... dying?"

It was strange. I could recall remember the moments perfectly, almost as if I actually had experienced them, almost as if I had actually died 3 times.

"This is a dream?"

My voice was incredoulous, filled with shock. My hands were shaking, and I could feel the edge of doubt that clouded me.

I was struggling to convince myself that it was a dream.

"There's no way... that I died more than once... Right?"

Feeling my body, there was a tinge of pain of where the boy had been killed.

When I looked down, in front of me laid a purple shard.

Scribbled on it was GRS.

I looked around the dark, black room.

Perhaps that was the solution.

Picking up the purple shard, I pointed the shard against my head.

My hand shook violently, my face wrinkled, retracting to the shard.

"This is just a dream... right?"

A dream. A nightmare.

A fake reality.

"Besides... If I can die that many times..."

And then, I wondered.

In this world of darkness, where the light of life hid.

In this world of the past, where the light of the future hid.

“What happens if I die here?”